Superstitious Rituals

d06ee5110e0d35c7e92c2d8c341a35b9Hello once again, Readers!!! I finally saw The Great Gatsby last night and I loved it! I know that it has had a lot of mixed reviews…and I can understand why…but for my tastes and love of the novel, it was amazing!

But that’s not what I wanted to write about today. Prepare yourself for random information that really has nothing to do with anything and may even make your eyes cross! My eyes are crossing…a little.


Today I wanted to write about superstitions. They are so silly aren’t they? To place the outcome of a situation on one little detail that is most likely irrelevant to the problem. But I have so many and I can’t stop believing in them! How do you stop and feel comfortable in letting go, because really, I think it comes down to just letting go. You can’t plan the future because no matter how much you prepare, things will happen as they happen. We really don’t have control in the grand scheme of things. Right?

I know…you are probably wondering where this is coming from.

Well, I finished the Born in Flames trilogy. The third book is in the hands of my publisher now waiting to be reviewed. That means I can move on to another project which I have been dying to do. All these ideas have been floating around in my head, plus I have my NaNo project (which is my current WIP) to finish.

As I started reading through what I’ve already written and decided to change a few things, I decided that I wanted to write in a different font from Courier New (which is what I wrote trilogy in). But I just can’t bring myself to change it. What if by changing the font, I change my ability to write. Or I jinx myself?

Wow. Did I really just admit that absurdity. Yep. I did. And I have a few others too.

Like parking in the same areas to ensure I have a good day, switching laptops to write on, or even blogging a certain way. I don’t do it all the time, but on occasion, I find myself creating rituals that I become dependent on and scared to break. The whole point of me telling you is to share the silliness. It made me laugh the second I realized what I was doing. I’m not going to let fear of the unknown stop me or cause me to create silly fixes that have absolutely no power in changing my future.

So I’m going to change the stupid font and park in a new section. Wish me luck…lol.

Now to leave you with a question: Do you have any superstitions or rituals?

Echelon out ♥

I Fear My Fears

147492956516820417_dMffM4LX_bHello once again, Readers!!! AHHHHH!!! Someone help me!!! There’s a scary thing on my blog post! Eeek!

And scene.

Doesn’t that picture like totally freak you out. Like oh my god. Totally.

So I was sitting with Sonya the other day, shooting the shite, while skimming through Pinterest when I stumbled upon this here photo. Now for those of you who don’t know me, I am a supreme scaredy cat. Supreme to the max. I hate the dark. Absolutely, positively, will never be friends with the dark.

And to make matters worse, I am a scary movie addict. My imagination is verrrrryyyyyy loooonnnnggg. I have seen way too many films to ever recover from my fear. It’s the adrenaline rush that gets me every time. I just can’t resist even though I know that I will pay for it once the sun goes down.


I don’t have a bed frame because of that stupid urban legend about the guy under the ladies bed. She waited for her dog to lick her hand each night to tell her things were okay and on the last night of her life, it wasn’t the dog licking her hand. *shudder* Yeah, the dog was hanging in the shower.

Or the fact that every time I am in the dark, I feel like there is a ghost lurking or a man hiding somewhere. I can’t even drive down a dark, tree-lined road at night without thinking the girl from The Ring is going to pop out…lol. I am retardedly (there I go making up words again) paranoid. It’s bad, plain and simple.

So I should probably get to the point of this post so as to not waste any of your precious time. Your time is precious to me, my precious…lol.

My husband tells me the best way to deal with fear is to meet it head on. Especially my fear of the dark. Of course I made him explain, because how do you meet the dark head on?

He told me to think about why I am afraid of the dark. The dark is not a person. It cannot reach out and harm me. It is simply what happens when the earth spins us away from the sun. So I thought about it. It’s not so much the dark, but what is inside the dark that I cannot see. It’s the unknown that I am afraid of. I don’t know what is hiding in the shadows, therefore I fear it. I am blind to the future therefore I worry.

This can be applied to all of you who haven’t made that last leap in finishing your writing or publishing your work. What’s stopping you?

I felt the same way when I realized that my first novel was about to be published for the whole world to read. I barely ate for days because I had worked myself up over it. I even debated if it was the right choice. And of course, most of my thoughts were negative ones. The usual, “What if they hate it,” or “What if no one reads it.” You know, those pestering thoughts that plague every writer and even hold some back from ever publishing.

Here’s what I think: Who cares? Opinions are around every single corner. Most of what we see has been built off of opinions. There’s no escaping it.

A big part of life, is experiencing fear. Maybe fear makes us stronger…if you meet it head on that is. My husband said that he has plenty of fears, but he doesn’t shy from them. He faces them, shoving his fear far away from his mind and using it to fuel his courage. And he’s absolutely right. How are we to ever know what we can be if we shy away from the unknown?

That doesn’t mean I am investing in a bed frame though, lol. Sorry, but I don’t need something else to check every night before bed.

I digress.

That is all folks.

Echelon out ♥


See what I mean…freaking creepy! Even Harry can’t sleep without being bombarded by sparkling, lurking men.

Fenn’s Journal

-Day 3

The date didn’t go as planned. I should have known. When does anything ever go as planned for me? Is it even worth writing about anymore? I flip back through this journal and the majority of what I see is unplanned, not normal events taking place. What happened to the days when things made sense? Did they ever make sense?

There was a small moment, at the restaurant, when Aurora looked at me. I mean, she really looked at me. The blush in her cheeks and the way she bit her lower lip, it always happens when she’s nervous or embarrassed. She said I was the yin to her yang. I know that sounds silly, but it was the look in her eyes that made the statement so much more. The wall between us broke a little more.

At least I thought it did, because right when I was about to admit my feelings, she cut off me off with a load of crap about how she doesn’t want to ruin our relationship. Stupid girl stuff. She has to sort every freaking thing out. Nice and neat. Love isn’t neat. It isn’t something you can plan. Why can’t she see that?

Just asking that…scares me. What if she can’t see it because she doesn’t feel how I feel?

Blah. I’m sick of thinking like this. Something’s gotta give. I won’t even touch on what happened after the restaurant. I’m not ready to walk through that just yet. Saying that my denial backfired big time, is a HUGE understatement. I’ve got a lot to think about.

Oh, Aurora lost her journal. Well…she says she lost her journal. I’m not sure if I believe her though because I offered to buy her another and she said no. So much for that idea.