Fenn’s Journal ♥

- Day 1

Something happened today. To both of us. When we were at the bus stop this morning, there was this old guy there. I got the strangest feeling around him-like I knew him even though I’ve never seen him around town before. The power inside of me surged when I looked at him. My power only ever awakens when Aurora is in danger. It’s how I knew that something was up with him.

But for some strange reason, I didn’t think that he would hurt her. I felt that he was about to change her. Like if they spoke, she would be put through hell. It took everything in me to keep myself under control. It’s always like that though. I can’t let her know about me. I have a hard enough time trying to convince her that everything is fine when it comes to her accidents with fire. She looks to me to know that everything is okay. I can’t be honest about myself with her and still wear that facade that I’m okay with it…because I’m not. I hate that we don’t have an explanation for why we are the way we are.

It all came crashing down when we got on the bus. He dropped a necklace and when she touched it, she was thrown back into my lap. I knew right away that he was like me.  I knew, because I felt the energy coming off of him and spiking throughout Rory. I wanted to crush him for upsetting her. But when she turned around, her eyes were blood-red. That stopped me in my tracks. It scared the shit out of me. I initially thought that she had some sort of brain damage, but that wasn’t the case. She was changing, though into what I have no clue.

She thinks she’s a Demon or something. A Demon. Really? There’s no way. She has too much life in her to be something like that. Whatever is in her, was brought out by this guy. He knows something about us. But am I really ready to find out? If we go looking, then everything I’ve tried to hide from her will be brought to light.

Maybe if I tell her the truth about myself, it will bring us closer. She is a stickler for being honest. But wouldn’t that be selfish? Would it help her to worry about me? I can’t do that to her. She deserves so much. My need to protect her will always come first. She is my everything and one day she will wake up and see that. I just hope it happens before everything spirals out of control. With this guy in town…there’s no telling when that will happen.

Later,

Fenn

- Day 1

Aurora found out about me tonight. About my secret I mean. That creep came around again and ruined everything. He showed up at the diner today and as we were locking up, he spoke of a prophecy that we are a part of. He’s opened her eyes. This is exactly what I feared would happen. I can already feel her slipping away from me.

He knows things about us and it scares the crap out of me. The sad thing is, I’m not sure why. I should feel relieved to have this weight off my chest. To have this secret disintegrate between us. But I’m not happy about it. Rory was so upset with me. The look in her eyes, well, it hurt worse than any knife could. I can’t blame her for feeling that way either. I did it to myself. I knew I should have been honest with her. But what’s worse is now this guy has gotten inside her head.

I tried to pull her away from him, to keep her from hearing the truth, but she never listens to me! She can be so freaking hard-headed. And she blows everything out of proportion. Just like tonight. Rather than listening to me, she cut me off which only fueled the argument between us and pushed her further away. She actually wanted to hear what this guy had to say. He could be a danger to her! Why doesn’t she understand that? If he is from somewhere else, somewhere where Aurora and I came from, then what if he is an enemy?

I just want to shake some sense into her!

But then I remember what she’s going through. She doesn’t know why she is the way she is. I’m talking about her power over fire. All this time she thought she was alone in this, when she wasn’t. I could have easily told her about my powers and made her feel better about herself, but I didn’t. So what right do I have going off on her for the way she acts? I’m just as guilty. I’ve stirred this pot just as much.

I honestly thought I was helping her by keeping her in the dark. Apparently I was wrong, because now she doesn’t trust me anymore than she trusts this creepy guy. I can only imagine what she must be feeling. Oh well. The only thing I can do now is be honest with her. I’ve gone so long with keeping my thoughts locked up…it’s not going to be easy.

I’m going to tell her tonight. I’m going to sit her down and tell her everything. It’s the least I could do.

Later,

Fenn

- Day 2

I told her everything. Well, as much as there was to tell. She didn’t freak out on me like I thought she would though. She actually seemed excited, probably because now she knows she is not alone. In a way, I felt like it brought us closer than we have ever been. That cynical weight has been lifted from off my shoulders. I can finally be me around her.

But what’s even better, is we sort of connected. I don’t really know how to explain it, but this lullaby played in the back of my mind as I looked into her alluring green eyes. I wanted to reach out and touch her face…to feel her skin under my fingertips. I wanted to kiss her delicate lips, the same lips that make me smile every time she speaks. Mostly, I wanted to confess to her the feelings I have been harboring for quite some time now.

And for a moment…just a small, significant moment in time, I think she wanted that too. I could see it behind the wall she has built up around her. I could see some off the structure crumbling around us as our souls really recognized each other. It’s like something inside of her, whatever she is, was choosing me. Of course I accepted, but then she turned away from me.

She’s not ready to admit it yet and I won’t force it on her. I want her to realize that she loves me on her own. It will probably be awhile since she is so stubborn, but all I have is time. As long as this creep guy doesn’t ruin everything. My fists burn just thinking about him and all the things he said. We are from another realm. How crazy is that? As crazy as the powers we harness, I suppose.

Maybe I am just being pig-headed about it. I’ve always ran off my instincts. My instinct tells me to keep Aurora away from this guy. He is going to throw everything we have ever known out of sync. I don’t think I am ready for that. What if I lose her before I ever had the chance to win her? I can’t stand the thought of never being with her. I know she is the one for me. I have to keep her away from him.

I know…I am going to plan a trip. One that will surely bring her to her senses. She’s never been horseback riding and she spoke of it a few times. It will not only keep her occupied, but it will get us far away from this guy. If I take her to the other side of the island then there’s no way he can find us. And there’s no way she can deny her feelings. Not if I give her the perfect day.

I hope tonight will be the night. Even if I have to tell her first. She’s going to see what we both feel.

Later,

Fenn

-Day 3

The date didn’t go as planned. I should have known. When does anything ever go as planned for me? Is it even worth writing about anymore? I flip back through this journal and the majority of what I see is unplanned, not normal events taking place. What happened to the days when things made sense? Did they ever make sense?

There was a small moment, at the restaurant, when Aurora looked at me. I mean, she really looked at me. The blush in her cheeks and the way she bit her lower lip, it always happens when she’s nervous or embarrassed. She said I was the yen to her yang. I know that sounds silly, but it was the look in her eyes that made the statement so much more. The wall between us broke a little more.

At least I thought it did, because right when I was about to admit my feelings, she cut off me off with a load of crap about how she doesn’t want to ruin our relationship. Stupid girl stuff. She has to sort every freaking thing out. Nice and neat. Love isn’t neat. It isn’t something you can plan. Why can’t she see that?

Just asking that…scares me. What if she can’t see it because she doesn’t feel how I feel?

Blah. I’m sick of thinking like this. Something’s gotta give. I won’t even touch on what happened after the restaurant. I’m not ready to walk through that just yet. Saying that my denial backfired big time, is a HUGE understatement. I’ve got a lot to think about.

Oh, Aurora lost her journal. Well…she says she lost her journal. I’m not sure if I believe her though because I offered to buy her another and she said no. So much for that idea.

Later,

Fenn

-Day 4

I’m ready to think about what happened last night. I’m going to have to face it sooner or later.

Let me start by writing: Everything is different now.

It started at the restaurant. After I tried to tell Rory that I had feelings for her, she shot me down with her BS excuse about how we couldn’t work because of our “past”. I played my declaration off as trying to buy a car together instead of the confession that it really was.

Lame, but it was all I could think of.

I think she was upset that I didn’t push harder. She’s used to me making her listen. But I’m not going to force her to recognize that she loves me more than a friend. She has to fall, just like every one else. Just like I did for her. Only then will it be real between us.

Any way, she excused herself. That creep guy was nearby, because as soon as she left, he approached our table. He said he needed me to listen to him. He said if I took her to the horse ranch, it would alternate the course we were supposed to be on. He said I should take her home instead because there would be a bad storm and we would be caught in the middle. Lightning would strike, thus causing a fire nearby. He said this fire will set Aurora on a path that I wouldn’t be able to follow.

I don’t exactly know why, but I saw red.

I did what I thought was right in the moment. I took him outside. I was ready to show him just what I thought of him. I wanted him to leave us alone. I didn’t want to believe that he could be right. I didn’t want to know that Aurora and I were truly different. I didn’t believe that we were from somewhere else.

And boy was I wrong.

I took her to the horse ranch any way, despite Rory being angry with me for shoving the creep even further away from us. And, well, lightning struck.

What happened last night, it was something that I am still trying to wrap my mind around. After Rory fell off her horse and was nicked in the head, lightning struck a tree nearby. The fire was alive if that makes any sense. It seemed to sense Aurora. It moved towards her and encircled her. It scared the shit out of me. Every fiber in my being screamed to protect her. I thought she was going to burn alive. But when I tried to pull her from the fire, she had this vacant look in her eyes. She wasn’t my Rory, but something much more powerful. She threw me backwards with a flick of her wrist.

I got up and tried again, refusing to give up on her. When I jumped through the wall of flames, they stuck to my skin like tar. That’s how she came back to me. She thought I was hurt. Luckily, I heal quickly, always have. The burns were gone within seconds. She was so frail, so scared. It was in that moment, when we clung to each other as the rain drenched us, that I realized I had really messed up.

We could have been killed and all because I didn’t want to hear what that creepy guy had to say. I have to stop denying this. I have to come to terms with the fact that Aurora and I are meant for something more. And that the creepy guys knows exactly what it is.

I have to find him and make this right.

She’s stirring now. I put a Shortcake Band-aid on her bruise. I’m trying not to laugh at her cuteness. She’s so beautiful. I wish I could kiss her.

Man I need to get a life.

Later,

Fenn

 

-Day 4

She made me cinnamon rolls this morning. That has been her way of apologizing ever since we were kids. The first time was when we around the age of 13. We got into a huge argument about who was going to fold the laundry. She dumped my clothes down the stairs. Needless to say, I left them there for her to clean and locked myself in my room. What brought me out was the sweet smell of cinnamon rolls, my favorite breakfast food.

She had baked them for me with the help of Mily.

So when I woke to the smell this morning, I knew that somewhere deep down inside her thick head, she knows that she loves me. I could see it in her beautiful pleading eyes. She was so worried that I was going to be upset with her for last night. When is she going to realize she is perfect in my eyes? I was only upset because of the danger I had put her in by not listening to that creepy guy.

Which she also reminded me of this morning. She is dead set on finding him. I know she is right, it’s just this need I have to keep her safe that leaves me feeling leery all the time. But last night proved that my protective skills aren’t as sharp as I thought they were. Strength won’t solve everything.

I know this because a letter came for her shortly after breakfast. It was from someone from our past. Someone who knew things about us. Things that we were set on learning from Mr. Creepy. So now there is another player involved. The letter said that she has a choice and that the answers to her return home are inside a security deposit box. But what ‘home’ is the letter talking about? And who is this mysterious person? Rory thinks it’s from her mother…but what if she is wrong?

I’m excited and nervous, but mostly scared. I don’t know what’s going to happen, but I fear it’s out of my hands this time. The only thing I can do now is be there for her, which is why I am taking her to the bank now. I’m just waiting on her to come out of the bathroom.

Whoever it is, I’m crossing my fingers that they keep her out of danger. Lord knows she is a magnet for trouble.

Later,

Fenn

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